September 27, #FifthNight
Out-sat last night. Stars shone above through warm air, and the grass beneath me rustled as the arid leaves of the White Oak above me.
I sang Gog Galdr, and as They have since I was young, gathered in Their galdr.
As I sit here typing these words, I can ‘hear’ the voice so often asked on internet forums:
‘What did you ask for?’, ‘What do you need?’. It seems to me that this begging is a remnant of Christianization; for when I out-sit, I do so for companionship.
The Gogs are my friends, and I dare say ‘kin’, for as Helja has addressed me as ‘Sister’, as Angrboda has addressed me as ‘Little Sister’, so too the Gog embrace me with loving-kindness. In my every encounter in life, I can say: They have never hurt me, and always guided me.
But I digress. Last night was Grainne’s Last Setting, Her last gasping, for though She fought to remain, the Dark Lord must rise. And with Him, my heart.
Yes, it was the God who first came to me, in the dark, when I was six, standing over my bed. I was not frightened. I saw Him again the first time I died; when He welcomed me to the Underworld, but directed my return, for “It is not your time dear one.”
And so it was last night, lost in Gog song, enveloped in dark silence, when I heard His footfall. I did not look, for that sound is familiar and intimate, and simultaneously strange and allusive. I felt His slow smile long before I opened my eyes to see Him there: Robust and dark-eyed, menacing if He and I were not long-friends.
Smiling still, He extended his hand, and I took it, as He gently helped me to stand. Standing next to me, I felt His familiar musk, and heat from deep. While living in Germany, I decided to run the trails about Hoher Meissner, there, I encountered an underground fire. Later, in Brennender Berg, while deep in the woods, again, I came upon earth so warm that heat rose from its surface. Kneeling, you can touch it; digging you can release steam; and on occasion, when the surface is cracked, you can see the deep smoldering. That is the Dark Lord – seething beneath, molten, a viscous heat that reaches deep into bone.
We walked without words, old friends. His appearance is constant, yet varies; His age is Primordial, where I am but aged. As we walked He showed me an image of the Wyrdlings – the good folk of Wise Home; we were laughing and learning, enjoying both the journey and the company it brought. Then, He turned to me and said, “Gather them”, then all about me were Silver Runes – small and lustrous, their shining brightness like stars in a dark sky. It seemed I traveled the world to gather them, and in the twinkling of an eye, I returned. Before me was a Rune Skin, and the Wyrdlings were waiting for me to cast them.
They fell from my hands like snow – many sided, and soft-falling – I remember hearing awe and wonder, and then I Woke.
Later that evening, walking beneath that same White Oak, I found an Old Man of the Woods ..
That was yesterday.
September 28, #SixthNight
Today .. hypnopompic this morning, a beloved friend came to me: Huny, a Rhodesian Ridgeback. I was sitting and she came, as she always did, to sit with me, resting her head on my lap as I read.
There, in the #dreamvision, she slept, died, decayed, and was bone in svá er auðr. As bone, I held her close, told her how much I loved her, and that it made me happy she came with this gift.
Upon waking, one of my morning rites is to walk the yard with tea in hand ..
It’s darker this morning, and cooler than yesterday. By 7am yesterday, it was warm and light outside. This morning at the same time, its twilight and cool .. birds still singing their morning song.
I walk to the ‘spirit house’ to sit, and found this ..
I often say: I am a #BoneWoman – and trust that there is research to support this role – but more important than that is the meaning of ‘bone’.
Bone is said to be the ‘rocks’ of earth, the remnants of Augelmir or Earthus perhaps. According to archaeology, they are the oldest known tools of divination. The Chinese and Greeks, Indians and Armenians, Etruscans and Africans, and many other ancient tribes used them. Notably, in many of these finds, it is commonly believed that an animal was sacrificed, its flesh consumed, then its bones were read.
I Know bones as seeds. As the last lingering remnants of the body, they appear indestructible; and in archaeological finds, are akin in appearance to stone. Perhaps this is why they are viewed as both transitionary and ever-lasting. As such, I tend to view them as living memory, a last bit of existence that contains the thoughts, words, and deeds of its last incarnation.
While training with Sami Noaide in Finland, I was gifted a set of bones. The memory of their use – indelibly left by both previous owners – remains upon them. Perhaps then, bone is a repository, so that, hidden deep within its matrix, far removed from rigidity, rests support and protection, storage and content, provision and endurance, and the wisdom of change.
Its honeycomb-like matrix is a pathway for all life and so All That Lives. The Proto Indo-European root is *ost-, but that only relates back to ‘bone’. It’s not until we look at Sanskrit asthi that we see ‘bone; kernel of truth’; and ‘kernel’ here is not poetic, but from PIE and Proto-Germanic *kurnilo-, meaning ‘seed, grain; bone’.
k/Knowing as I do, I organically relate the burial of bones beneath the hearth as an act of Love. Graintuiri is a Tide of Love (one of the 9 L’s). This Autumnal Equinox, this celestial turning, reminds us (among other things) to honor old age, to love the aged, to realize their role within clan / kin / tribe. Likewise, the stone held to be most important during this season is tourmaline. Its rainbow colors indicate that it came from Above to Below, from haven to earth.
Tourmaline is indeed a good stone for out-sitting during this tide, because it corresponds with autumn, and is said to help one realize s/Self. I have found the Nattura particular fond of green tourmaline (and green stones in general), and when carried in my pocket, it seems to calm my heart and mind .. to the very bone. Finally, an interesting aside: Dutch traders during the 1700s used tourmaline for its ‘magnetic; polar’ abilities; so perhaps it attracts all these things.
Whatever one believes, bones are certainly part of my Seidr storehouse. Personally validated (yet again), through the experience of these last few dreamvisions.
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6” x 4.5”